We are back from Latvia..sorry it took me so long to update. Just lots to do with just getting back and Christmas coming up, etc. We had a great trip, not too long, and we were able to bring Gertrude home with us. Halleluiah!
Our trip to Latvia was only for a one week custody period, but with traveling we were gone about 10 days. The Monday after we received temporary custody, the Orphancourt inspector visited us and asked us questions, then spoke with Gertrude alone about if she would like to come home with us early. She said she could come home early or stay. Once we told her she will be coming home early with us, her whole demeanor was different. She was good and sweet for the previous few days, but not very affectionate with Scott and me and would get mad easily if we teased her or told her something she already knew. After this news, she seemed to relax and felt comfortable getting close to us again. With Tena it never changes, she is close and affectionate with her always, just the parents that get dissed sometimes!
Gertrude had a cellphone given to her by her mom, and every day she talked to her mom and her sister, sometimes friends. Gertrude sounded frustrated and impatient with her mom in most of the conversations and in one near the end of our trip she was literally yelling at her mom for about 5 or 10 minutes. We learned from the Children’s Home director that she has been getting a lot of pressure about the adoption from her mom and sister and I can only guess this was more of the same.
I showed Gertrude several pictures of my side of the family. She saw a picture of my mom and she says, “she pretty” but that was her only commentary on the pictures. She and Tena spent a lot of time playing Game Boy and DS and we played cards, memory games, Uno, watched movies on the laptop. We had a lot of fun together.
On Saturday we went to Big Lido, a large restaurant and entertainment complex with another couple in Latvia for court also, the Kannels. On Sunday we went to church with our friend Ilga Lasmane and the Kannels. It was very enjoyable but almost 3 hours long. Not quite used to that! We had headphones so we could hear it in English and it was a very nice and powerful service. The kids went to class and they were asked questions about family. Gertrude and Tena both drew pictures of Scott, me, Tena, Gertrude and Allie. That gave me some confidence she is thinking of us as her family despite all the confusion! We had a great time and afterwards we all went to this medieval style restaurant that was an actual building built in the 1500’s. They had no electricity and used just candles. It was an interesting experience! Scott ordered trout and it came with head, tail and all. He was more than a little surprised and wasn’t sure how to go about eating it! Once he started though, he said it was very good. I think I would have had to pass on dinner if that was my fish!
On Wednesday, 5 days after we received custody, Gertrude’s dad showed up to the Orphancourt again. I don’t know what transpired, but it did not affect anything. Since his rights are terminated, there was nothing he could do. I have to admit though, when my attorney said those words, “her dad came to court” I couldn’t help but have fear strike temporarily!
We had so much help from our friends there again, there is no way we could have done it without them. Helen Vipase and Ilga Lasmane were just there for anything we needed, to take us where we needed to go, to use their computer to type documents, talking to Gertrude about sensitive matters that we had trouble communicating because of the language, etc. We could never thank them enough. It made our trip successful and MUCH LESS stressful! On Thursday night we were able to have Helen Vipase and another friend Helen Grimshaw over for dinner. It was nice entertaining in our temporary apartment. The apartment is really nice though and very efficient so it was quite easy to do and we had a very nice time.
When we found out we could bring Gertrude home with us, we had to book her a flight and there was no more room on our original flight for her. So, we had to change mine and book Gertrude with me. We all left on Sat. Dec. 1 but our flight left at 6:00 am and Scott and Tena’s at 9:00 am. We had some trouble getting our ticket e-mailed and finally had to call my mom to help us contact Travelocity and handle it for us! It was tricky calling from the coffee shop on the computer, hard to hear, agents with heavy accents, on hold forever, etc. My mom was a lifesaver!
Friday night Helen took us to Gertrude’s Children’s Home to pack and to say good-bye. The children’s home is quite nice, not what one might expect. The walls were colorful and the kids’ rooms were nicely furnished. Of course, it still has that institutional feel and it’s communal living so not quite like home. Saying good-bye to her sister was hard. She is having a very hard time with this adoption of her sister for many reasons I think we can’t even understand. But, it is best for Gertrude and I think she will realize that one day. The girls had their dance class that evening and Gertrude begged to be able to participate one last time. So she did and we got some video of it. It was wonderful..it’s hip hop but the dancing was a bit different than the hip hop style here, at least different from Tena’s class. Gertrude was very good though and she loves to dance. In fact, she asked if she could take a dance or drawing class when she gets to America. The Children’s Home director, Ilga Grintale, gave me a couple pictures of Gertrude when she was about 5 years old, and Gertrude has one of her and her dad when she was about 1 or so. But, those are the only “baby” pictures we have of her. I hope we can get hold of more before this is all finished.
So, getting to the time when it was time to go home..We had to get up at 2:30 a.m. to take a cab to the airport at 3:30. I woke up at 12 with a scary thought. The paper from the court authorizing Gertrude to cross the border out of Latvia said she can cross with Scott and Karen Murphy. But, she was only crossing with me. I was so worried this was going to cause a problem and that I would be stuck there another few days, have to go back to court to have them draw up another document. The apartment we were in was also rented out the next day so I was thinking I’d have to find another place to stay. I could not get back to sleep! At the airport the next day, the guy at passport control literally read the entire document. I stood there for a full 5 minutes thinking he’s going to ask me why Scott is not flying on this flight. He never spoke to me, never cracked a smile. But, when he was done reading it, he handed it back to me and waved me through. Whew! What a relief that was! The flight home wasn’t bad. Gertrude and I had a good time together and we played Uno and cards, a memory game and Word Find. She is excellent at word find and really likes it. She spent hours doing that on the plane and during our 4 hour layover in Czechoslovakia. A few times on the plane, Gertrude expressed excitement about coming home. She did call it “home” and she would clap her hands and say “I am so happy, or I want to see my room, or Yeah! tomorrow we get Allie (our dog)" She also talked about how she likes our house, “not children’s home.” When we got home she already unpacked and tried on a bunch of clothes that a neighbor had given us for her. Since she’s been here she has called her sister and friends every day. She wanted to call her mom today but the number must have been wrong because it didn’t work (I swear I didn’t sabotage it!!) She misses her family and friends understandably, but so far she is also having a blast here. In fact, Tena, Gertrude and Tena’s friends from the neighborhood were just jumping on the trampoline (there were 5 other girls here). Then they all wanted to walk down to the cul-de-sac where all of those girls live and play down there. Tena does this all the time with these kids. Gertrude asked me if they could go, practically begged me really, “please mom please.” So she is fitting right in and we couldn’t be more happy!
Gertrude had a cellphone given to her by her mom, and every day she talked to her mom and her sister, sometimes friends. Gertrude sounded frustrated and impatient with her mom in most of the conversations and in one near the end of our trip she was literally yelling at her mom for about 5 or 10 minutes. We learned from the Children’s Home director that she has been getting a lot of pressure about the adoption from her mom and sister and I can only guess this was more of the same.
I showed Gertrude several pictures of my side of the family. She saw a picture of my mom and she says, “she pretty” but that was her only commentary on the pictures. She and Tena spent a lot of time playing Game Boy and DS and we played cards, memory games, Uno, watched movies on the laptop. We had a lot of fun together.
On Saturday we went to Big Lido, a large restaurant and entertainment complex with another couple in Latvia for court also, the Kannels. On Sunday we went to church with our friend Ilga Lasmane and the Kannels. It was very enjoyable but almost 3 hours long. Not quite used to that! We had headphones so we could hear it in English and it was a very nice and powerful service. The kids went to class and they were asked questions about family. Gertrude and Tena both drew pictures of Scott, me, Tena, Gertrude and Allie. That gave me some confidence she is thinking of us as her family despite all the confusion! We had a great time and afterwards we all went to this medieval style restaurant that was an actual building built in the 1500’s. They had no electricity and used just candles. It was an interesting experience! Scott ordered trout and it came with head, tail and all. He was more than a little surprised and wasn’t sure how to go about eating it! Once he started though, he said it was very good. I think I would have had to pass on dinner if that was my fish!
On Wednesday, 5 days after we received custody, Gertrude’s dad showed up to the Orphancourt again. I don’t know what transpired, but it did not affect anything. Since his rights are terminated, there was nothing he could do. I have to admit though, when my attorney said those words, “her dad came to court” I couldn’t help but have fear strike temporarily!
We had so much help from our friends there again, there is no way we could have done it without them. Helen Vipase and Ilga Lasmane were just there for anything we needed, to take us where we needed to go, to use their computer to type documents, talking to Gertrude about sensitive matters that we had trouble communicating because of the language, etc. We could never thank them enough. It made our trip successful and MUCH LESS stressful! On Thursday night we were able to have Helen Vipase and another friend Helen Grimshaw over for dinner. It was nice entertaining in our temporary apartment. The apartment is really nice though and very efficient so it was quite easy to do and we had a very nice time.
When we found out we could bring Gertrude home with us, we had to book her a flight and there was no more room on our original flight for her. So, we had to change mine and book Gertrude with me. We all left on Sat. Dec. 1 but our flight left at 6:00 am and Scott and Tena’s at 9:00 am. We had some trouble getting our ticket e-mailed and finally had to call my mom to help us contact Travelocity and handle it for us! It was tricky calling from the coffee shop on the computer, hard to hear, agents with heavy accents, on hold forever, etc. My mom was a lifesaver!
Friday night Helen took us to Gertrude’s Children’s Home to pack and to say good-bye. The children’s home is quite nice, not what one might expect. The walls were colorful and the kids’ rooms were nicely furnished. Of course, it still has that institutional feel and it’s communal living so not quite like home. Saying good-bye to her sister was hard. She is having a very hard time with this adoption of her sister for many reasons I think we can’t even understand. But, it is best for Gertrude and I think she will realize that one day. The girls had their dance class that evening and Gertrude begged to be able to participate one last time. So she did and we got some video of it. It was wonderful..it’s hip hop but the dancing was a bit different than the hip hop style here, at least different from Tena’s class. Gertrude was very good though and she loves to dance. In fact, she asked if she could take a dance or drawing class when she gets to America. The Children’s Home director, Ilga Grintale, gave me a couple pictures of Gertrude when she was about 5 years old, and Gertrude has one of her and her dad when she was about 1 or so. But, those are the only “baby” pictures we have of her. I hope we can get hold of more before this is all finished.
So, getting to the time when it was time to go home..We had to get up at 2:30 a.m. to take a cab to the airport at 3:30. I woke up at 12 with a scary thought. The paper from the court authorizing Gertrude to cross the border out of Latvia said she can cross with Scott and Karen Murphy. But, she was only crossing with me. I was so worried this was going to cause a problem and that I would be stuck there another few days, have to go back to court to have them draw up another document. The apartment we were in was also rented out the next day so I was thinking I’d have to find another place to stay. I could not get back to sleep! At the airport the next day, the guy at passport control literally read the entire document. I stood there for a full 5 minutes thinking he’s going to ask me why Scott is not flying on this flight. He never spoke to me, never cracked a smile. But, when he was done reading it, he handed it back to me and waved me through. Whew! What a relief that was! The flight home wasn’t bad. Gertrude and I had a good time together and we played Uno and cards, a memory game and Word Find. She is excellent at word find and really likes it. She spent hours doing that on the plane and during our 4 hour layover in Czechoslovakia. A few times on the plane, Gertrude expressed excitement about coming home. She did call it “home” and she would clap her hands and say “I am so happy, or I want to see my room, or Yeah! tomorrow we get Allie (our dog)" She also talked about how she likes our house, “not children’s home.” When we got home she already unpacked and tried on a bunch of clothes that a neighbor had given us for her. Since she’s been here she has called her sister and friends every day. She wanted to call her mom today but the number must have been wrong because it didn’t work (I swear I didn’t sabotage it!!) She misses her family and friends understandably, but so far she is also having a blast here. In fact, Tena, Gertrude and Tena’s friends from the neighborhood were just jumping on the trampoline (there were 5 other girls here). Then they all wanted to walk down to the cul-de-sac where all of those girls live and play down there. Tena does this all the time with these kids. Gertrude asked me if they could go, practically begged me really, “please mom please.” So she is fitting right in and we couldn’t be more happy!
It’s funny to see how things are different here and what Gertrude is used to or not. I turned the garbage disposal on this morning and she gets this puzzled look on her face and starts looking around the dishwasher for what that noise was! I showed her how the disposal works and she wanted to put her hand down it! Things we just wouldn’t think of as new experiences.
This Saturday we are having her Latvian friend Christina over to spend the night. I think that will be really special for both of them. Then, on Dec. 18, the kids from Latvia come over for the Christmas hosting. Gertrude’s very good friend and bunkmate Veronika will be here, and a couple other kids from her Children’s Home and Helen Vipase is chaperoning. So, she will get to see more friends again already. We are not going home to Michigan for Christmas for the first time ever, and I am disappointed about that. But, it’s just hard with another Latvia trip coming up probably right around Christmas, and Gertrude being new here still, her friends coming into town, etc. I think it’s best if we just spend a nice quiet Christmas together, just the four of us, then pick the tradition back up next year.
Today (Tuesday) was my first day alone with Gertrude. Tena went back to school and she and I stayed here. We had a good time, doing her typing program, jumping on the trampoline, we took Allie for a walk. Gertrude is doing great with the typing. She is extremely diligent and persistent. It wouldn’t surprise me if she was typing 25 wpm in no time! Presently she does about 7 wpm. Tomorrow we start Homeschooling. I will homeschool her until the adoption is final and then she will start school after that. So, that about wraps it up. We can’t wait till it’s all final and done. Even though she is here and we are blessed, it will be nice when it’s finished!
This Saturday we are having her Latvian friend Christina over to spend the night. I think that will be really special for both of them. Then, on Dec. 18, the kids from Latvia come over for the Christmas hosting. Gertrude’s very good friend and bunkmate Veronika will be here, and a couple other kids from her Children’s Home and Helen Vipase is chaperoning. So, she will get to see more friends again already. We are not going home to Michigan for Christmas for the first time ever, and I am disappointed about that. But, it’s just hard with another Latvia trip coming up probably right around Christmas, and Gertrude being new here still, her friends coming into town, etc. I think it’s best if we just spend a nice quiet Christmas together, just the four of us, then pick the tradition back up next year.
Today (Tuesday) was my first day alone with Gertrude. Tena went back to school and she and I stayed here. We had a good time, doing her typing program, jumping on the trampoline, we took Allie for a walk. Gertrude is doing great with the typing. She is extremely diligent and persistent. It wouldn’t surprise me if she was typing 25 wpm in no time! Presently she does about 7 wpm. Tomorrow we start Homeschooling. I will homeschool her until the adoption is final and then she will start school after that. So, that about wraps it up. We can’t wait till it’s all final and done. Even though she is here and we are blessed, it will be nice when it’s finished!
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