The Last Couple Weeks

Well, it has been an extremely busy month . Sorry I haven't updated in quite a while. We had a great time with Gertrude, but now she's back in Latvia and at camp. We can't even call her. Camp is very boring according to the kids, and they have to walk 3 miles to get to s wim, and that's all they do. They can play games if they brought some. So, quite different than camp here! Anyway, I'll just recap here some of Gertrude's cute phrases and antics, and some of the talks we had together.

One of Gertrude’s signature phrases is a sarcastic “thank you.” If you don’t give her something she wants, or if you make a sharp turn in the car, or anything that makes her unhappy with you, she’ll give you that little “thank you.” We usually just say “you’re welcome” and that’s the end of it!

Gertrude really likes Scott’s car. Whenever we would ride in his car, she’d say, “I like this car, or I like Pop’s car.” I’d ask her which she liked better, mine or his, and she would give me the politically correct answer, “both.”

Gertrude made pancakes one morning. She did everything, I just told her what to do. Later that day in the car she was talking about how she wants an ipod. I told her once she lives here she can work and make money to save for it, like Christina did. She says, “what work Mom, how I work?” Later she says, “mom, work, make pancakes, you give me money?” Another day we were talking and she wants to take care of the crabs as one of her “jobs.” I heard her and Tena talking one day in the car and she said “I watch crabs, mom give me money money money.” Boy, she is ready to get her hands on some cash and get that ipod!

Scott and I went out for our anniversary to dinner while Gertrude spent a couple hours at Christina's. Tena spent the night at a friends. We originally had Gertrude spending the night at Christina’s till we found out the hosted kids have to be with their host parents overnight. So, after our anniversary dinner, we brought them both here. They had a blast just speaking in Latvian, giggling. Then we all watched a movie together. The next day Christina told me “Gertrude will say yes.” Gertrude looked at her like she didn’t want her to say anything and she was embarrassed. She was talking about "yes" to being adopted..Yeah, that's what we like to hear!
Before we went out that night, Gertrude helped me pick out my clothes, voiced her disapproval with some of the shirts I put on with my pants, till finally she conceded that one outfit was ok (not great however!)

Gertrude does have her eye on a lot of things she wants. After swimming at Seven Hills we drove around there and looked at some houses. She would say “I like this, I like” at many of the larger homes. Then we walked through one and she and Tena decided which room was each of theirs. A couple days later Gertrude mentioned to Scott that she liked those houses. Boy, she has expensive taste! She has her eye on my jewelry (she says she only has one pair of earrings) and one night she showed me in Tena’s room what she wants for her room. She points to Tena’s hamper and waste basket that are white and says “my room white (meaning furniture), Tena no, this in my room. I want this, this, this (pointing to ceiling fan, shelf, knick knacks), musica (Tena’s stereo). I tried to tell her she’ll get some things a little at a time. We’ll buy one thing, then later, another, not all at once.

I started having some talks with Gertrude about living here and being adopted. First, I told her that when you live here, you will miss Agnese, and your parents? She agreed and I told her she can call, write, e-mail, and she added “inbox” an online communication tool they use over there. I told her I know she loves her sister and parents, friends there, but she can love sister, parents friends here too. It’s ok to love lots of people. She seemed to understand and accept this idea. Then, as we passed the elementary school, I explained that Tena used to go there and that she will go there. She gave a little pouty face and I told her I worked there a lot and would be there too sometimes. She asked me, “you see me?” and I told her yes and I would say “Hi Gertrude.” She responded, "and I say, that’s my mom.” Another conversation about school, Tena told her she can take the bus and it’s really fun. She responded that "mom and I go home together, I wait for her.” So, we are getting her in the mindset of living here. Our last conversation, the day before she went back, I told her, “you know we are trying to adopt you, we love you very very much. We’re waiting, waiting for Latvia to say it’s ok to come and when they so, we’ll come. I explained that many things about America are good for her because she’ll have lots of love, good schools and can get a good job, which is all hard to do in Latvia. She talks often of things that she'll do or what she wants, and when she comes back.

One night, Gertrude had her arm over me laying on her bed and she says, “I love my mom.” I wanted to clarify and said “me, mom?” to which she answered yes. She is so much more expressive this year. I think it’s because she really knows us and knows for sure we love her. I think she knew it last year but probably wasn't absolutely sure, and it was probably a little more like fantasyland than reality in some ways to her.

Gertrude likes to tease a lot. She’ll have my keys and ask me where my keys are, or where my purse is. Once I left the keys in the car at a neighbors for a few minutes and when we started to leave, she tells me the car is gone. One day she was counting coins and I was relating it to lats, the Latvian money, and she kept asking me, “what’s lats?” She is lots of fun. She loves to play Go Fish, which she learned this trip, and she is pretty competitive in her game playing!

Last year, if I caught Gertrude starting to dance to a song or anything like that, she immediately would stop. Now, she’ll move to her Game Boy making sound, or the radio, etc. almost showing me her little dances. I just have so many glimpses of her being so much more confident and comfortable than she was before. It’s really a wonderful thing to see her like this. She also likes to get her picture taken, where last year she usually balked about it. In fact, she wanted me to take a picture of her with the camera phone, and she fixes her hair and says, “pretty” and I took her picture. This was near the end of her visit. Normally, Gertrude will NOT say she is pretty. In fact we tell her to say “I’m pretty” and she’ll say “I’m no pretty.” She will tell me I’m pretty, her sister Agnese, Tena, but not her.” So, when I heard her say this I thought it was a great breakthrough. These kids generally have a low self-esteem and we are trying to get it through her head that she is pretty and smart. Scott was playing with her in the pool one day and told her she has to say “I’m pretty” and he’ll throw her in the air some more. But, she would say, “I’m no pretty” so Scott would give her a “toilet flush” where he pushes her under. It became a fun game and just a couple times she would say she was pretty. Last year, I finally got it through her head that God loves her, (not just everyone else but her, as she liked to imply) and she still believes that this time, so I think it stuck. Now we just have to work on the rest of it!

It was an incredible month, and we can see how truly beautifully Gertrude does fit in with our family. We can't wait till she is here permanently. Speaking of which, on June 26 was hearing for her dad's rights, and he didn't show. Next hearing is Aug. 22. If he doesn't show, his rights will be terminated. If he does, I'm not sure. His rights will probably still be terminated but guess it depends on the judge and what transpires in court. If they decide to terminate, we THINK we may be able to travel again by October and have the adoption completed by Christmas. That's if nothing else goes wrong of course! We have to redo all our paperwork, because it will expire before then, but we'll do what we have to do. Maybe 2007 will be the year we finally have our second!!